For Mothers

I wrote this poem in February of 2009 when our youngest daughter had been quite ill after an episode of Crohn's disease held the two of us hostage in the hospital for two weeks. Here is a link to the original post if you want to read more about that tumultuous time. The thing is, the feelings still apply whether our children are sick or healthy, and life ebbs and flows in cycles of difficulty and ease. 

~Wishing all of us mothers and grandmothers and daughters who may one day be mothers too a blessed Mother's Day, filled with exactly the portion of love we need.

Portions of Love

Not rations

At times small when that is what’s needed

Yet always generous

Because of the place from which Love arises

The heart ever expanding

My heart

Breaking and healing

Fearful and full

Of gratitude

At the unexpected turns this life is taking.

Portions of Love

For my daughters and husband

My parents, siblings, teachers and friends

Students and strangers

Nurses and doctors

Who meet me in the place that they are

Hearts present

My heart

Receiving and offering

Measured moments

Of accepting

The blessings that are hidden in seemingly blemished fruits

Gifts revealed

After the swift intake of breath

In the sigh of relief

Another day has passed

And we are still here

A family intact

Growing stronger

Each portion of love

Grand, lavish, delectable

More than enough

To fill the holes anxiety

Attempts to eat away from our souls

But cannot

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Simply

some days feel so complicated

 

simple awareness soothes the soul

simply observing the motion of clouds above

  watching the clouds of thought 

and emotion

shifting within

simply noticing what is

soothes the soul

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Chesed she b'Tiferet

This evening will begin Day 15, chesed she b’tiferet-lovingkindness in compassion, as Jews around the world continue the spiritual practice of Counting the Omer, the 49 days between the second day of Pesach (aka: Passover-celebrating freedom-the exodus from Egypt-Mitzrayim-the narrow place) to Shavuot (the revelation of Torah on Mt. Sinai-a continuous unfolding through our life experiences, not just a story from long ago)

 

chesed she b’tiferet

am I fully present to the suffering of others

offering up myself completely in the moment

allowing the wall of duality between other and self to dissolve

or just being kind out of habit, without awareness?

lovingkindness in compassion

one within one

chesed she b’tiferet

am I fully immersed

in the tears, fears and pain of another soul

tenderly listening with the wholeness of my being

or simply wiping the drops away with a reactive gesture

mind elsewhere, heart guarded?

lovingkindness in compassion

one within one

chesed she b’tiferet

am I capable of the same attention

and genuine gentleness

when it comes to my own suffering

or do I slip away into someone else’s

to avoid my own?

lovingkindness in compassion

one within one

chesed she b’tiferet

am I able to greet the Divine

when I meet you or me in a silent moment of

lovingkindness in compassion

one within one?

Our brokenness becomes the space in which we meet, heart to heart, soul-to-soul, human-to-human, and human to God. It may be a brief flash of connection during which time feels boundless--and then it is gone and the walls of You/Me/Thou/Us/Them/It/I rise up again--but for that one moment recognizing our sacred ONENESS is as clear as the stream of consciousness, the ONE we swim through, and flows through us with or without our noticing.

One Shot Wednesday 

 

 Omer Counting Resources:

 The Spiritual Journey of Divine Compassion, a podcast by Rabbi Marc Margolius one of my teachers at the Institute for Jewish Spirituality

Spiritual Guide to Counting the Omer this little spiral bound book by Rabbi Simon Jacobson is a wonderful companion for traveling through each of the 49 days. We are currently in Week Three. 

Lev Counts the Omer  a beautiful guided meditation- visualization I found this morning.

How To Count the Omer: http://www.dayenu.com/omer.php

I will be relatively quiet in blogland for the next few days, focusing on family with deep lovingkindness and compassion.

Practicing Lovingkindness on Yom HaShoah

"Practicing lovingkindness...[means] that we learn to see the lives of others, really see them, as related to our own lives. It means that we open up to the possibility of caring for others not just because we like them or admire them or are indebted to them in some way, but because our lives are inextricably linked to one another's. We use the practice of lovingkindness meditation as a way to recover our innermost knowledge of that linkage as we dissolve the barriers we have been upholding and genuinely awaken to how connected we all are." ~ Sharon Salzberg, The Force of Kindness

Sharon's words sum up for me the essence of why we must remember those who have been murdered, and the possibility for tikkun olam, repairing our broken world, on this Yom HaShoah.

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